Unwanted ~ Part 31

Khushi

“Mama mama! Can you make special jalebis for my Mr Raichanda?”

”Your special jalebis?”

“Haan mama! It was Sir’s birthday today. And did you know, he got sugar ki bimaari too like me!”

 

I looked at Arushi, and I’m pretty sure that my eyes were bulging out of my head. Her Mr Raichanda has the same birthday as Arnav? Is diabetic like Arnav? Even his name… Could it be…

No no, of course not. It’s not possible. It’s just a coincidence. That’s it. Purely coincidental.

 

“I’ll make jalebis for your teacher and you can take them tomorrow.”

“Yay! Thank you mama.”

 

Placing a quick kiss on my cheek, Arushi rushed away. Something about all this was starting to make me feel uncomfortable. Everything about this man made me think about Arnav but it couldn’t be. Of course it couldn’t be. I was just overthinking, worrying for no reason.

 

*****

 

Have you ever realised how quickly the weekend comes round? Some weeks it feels like the week doesn’t end, whereas other times, Saturday seems to come round so quickly.

It was Saturday today, and me, Raj and Arushi had come to the mall. I needed to pick some bits up for myself and Arushi and Raj decided to tag along with us.

 

“Mama! I just remembered! I forgot to tell you that my teacher said that the jalebis were the best jalebis he’s eaten in a long time and that you make them exactly like his wife makes them.”

“Oh that’s good, that means he liked them?”

“He said he loved them!”

 

Hearing this made me feel some kind of relief. Since hearing about Mr Raichanda being a diabetic who shared the same birthday as Arnav, I had been worried about the what ifs. But hearing that this man was married and his wife made him good jalebis put me at ease. I mean, I know Arnav is married to Nimisha, but she never struck me as the type to make jalebis like me. So it couldn’t be Arnav. Surely not.

Turning my attention back to my daughter, I watched as she tugged at Raj’s arm because she saw a large bear walking around. It was one of those, where there was someone inside a bear costume, trying to promote something. But Arushi was still to young to realise that there was a normal person inside.

 

“No Arushi, we need to get you new shoes.”

”PLEASE mama!”

 

She looked up at me with big eyes. But I was immune to her big eyes. Raj however was not.

 

“I’ll take her to see the bear. You go and pick anything you need and we’ll meet you at the shoe shop in 20 minutes.”

 

Jumping, Arushi hugged Raj’s leg before taking his had again and dragging him towards the bear. I looked around myself and decided that maybe I should go and get myself a coffee while I waited for them.

Walking over to the little cafe, I ordered myself a coffee and took it to a little table by the window.
There used to be a time when I hated coffee. I used to make a coffee for Arnav every morning and he would force me to take a sip and I never would. Then one day, I actually did take a sip and I positively hated it.

But since coming here, I found myself drinking more and more coffee. I still wasn’t on Arnav’s level of coffee drinker, but I didn’t mind it either.

Taking my phone out of my bag, I scrolled though my messages, replied to a couple and then put my phone back. Picking up my coffee, I took a little sip and looked out of the window and then looked away again.

 

Wait a minute…

 

Eyes wide, I looked back out of the window again and there… There he was.

Blinking twice and rubbing my eyes, I needed to make sure I wasn’t hallucinating and I wasn’t.

There, stood just across from the coffee shop was Arnav. I should turn away, make sure he didn’t see me, but I couldn’t tear my eyes away from him. There he was. Rubbing my eyes one more time, I needed to make sure that he was actually real. Closing my eyes and opening them again, he was still there. He was real.

I felt frozen, stuck. I didn’t know what to do. Quickly turning away, I needed to get out of here and fast. Arnav couldn’t find me. I remained sat in my seat and when I looked out the window again, he was gone.

What… How? Did he know that I…

Taking my phone back out, I called Raj.

 

“Khushi?”

“Raj, I’m going to the car, come quickly. We need to leave.”

“But Arushi’s shoes…”

“Please. I need to go home now.”

“Khushi…”

“Please Raj! Just bring her and let’s go!”

 

I disconnected the call before he could say anything more and left the coffee shop. I looked over my shoulder at least a million times as I made my way back to the car. Arnav wasn’t following me and I don’t think he saw me.

Once I got to the car, I tried to stay hidden behind it, just in case Arnav did turn up, but he didn’t.

What was he doing here? How was he here? Arnav didn’t have any business in Mumbai? I mean he had his branch of AR, but he never really came down here. If anything needed to be done, he’d send Akash or mama ji. He never actually came to Mumbai himself. So why now? Did he somehow find out that I was here?

Hitting the side of my head lightly, I pushed that thought away. He wasn’t here because of me. He’s moved on with his life. He’s married to Nimisha. He wasn’t here for me. He must be here due to his own personal work. But regardless, I needed to lie low. I didn’t want to have to bump into Arnav randomly. I couldn’t deal with that.

It took me a while, but I remembered that day when Raj had seen in the paper that Arnav was in town due to business. I had forgotten all about that. So that’s why he was here. He must still be in down due to work regarding AR. That made me feel a little bit of peace. It means that he didn’t know that I was here and that he wasn’t here for me. Suddenly, I felt like I could breathe again.

A little time passed but not a lot when Raj and Arushi finally joined me. Unlocking the car, Raj strapped Arushi into her seat before coming over to me. I got into the car quickly and he came over to my door.

 

“Khushi, is everything…”

”Please just get into the car. I’ll explain everything when we get home. But now we need to get out of here.”

 

Raj looked at me like I was slightly crazy and I couldn’t help but feel slight crazy. He took a long hard look at me before finally shutting the door and coming back over to his side of the car. Sliding into his seat, he got ready and soon we were off. As we drove home, I felt myself calm down a little, but not a lot. Arnav was here. He is here! I saw him! He was right in front of me.

Leaning back in my seat, I rested my head against the headrest and shut my eyes.

He looked pretty much the same as he did all those years ago. Only his stubble was no longer stubble, he had a full beard. His hair was a little longer than how he liked it six years ago, but other than that he looked exactly the same.
It didn’t seem as though he had gained much weight, nor did it seem as though he had lost any weight.

Six years had passed, over six years, but he hadn’t aged at all. He still looks pretty much exactly the same. I wonder what he would think if he saw me. Would he think I’ve changed?

Seeing him again, it’s cooked up all kinds of feelings within me. I feel good, seeing him again after all these years, but at the same time, it also feels bittersweet.

Bittersweet because even though I saw him, I couldn’t speak to him, couldn’t hold him close, couldn’t touch him…

 

*****

 

The moment we got home, Raj sent Arushi off to find Veera mausi. He made sure that she was well and truly out of the room before turning his attention back to me.

He walked over to where I was standing and placed a hand on my shoulder. This makes me pay full attention to him. Taking me by the hand, he led me over to the sofa and got me to sit down and then he sat down beside me.

 

“What happened? Are you okay?”

“I…”

 

Taking a deep breath, I replayed what had happened in my head and then started to explain to Raj.

 

“I saw Arnav.”

“You did? Did he see you?”

”No. No he didn’t.”

“Then why did…”

”I panicked. It was afterwards that I remembered that you had already told me that he was here. When I saw him… I just froze. I thought maybe he had found me and I guess I got a bit scared. But then, when I was able to calm down, I thought about it properly and I realised I didn’t need to panic. I’m sorry Raj. I realise that I must have really got you worried as well.”

 

Placing a hand on my knee, he gave me a small smile before removing his hand again.

 

“It’s okay. I understand why you reacted the way you did. It must have been really weird to see him again after all these years. I can understand why you got so scared. But Khushi… Maybe you should try to reach out to him?”

 

Looking up, I could feel myself become tense again.

 

“Why would you say that?”

“I just think that maybe you should. Before we were speaking hypothetically, but now… Knowing he’s here, actually having seen him, I think maybe you should actually speak to him.”

”But what would I even talk to him about? Besides I don’t want to cause any trouble. He looked well. I’m going to assume he is doing well in life. I don’t want to re-enter his life and cause problems.”

 

Sighing, Raj got to his feet.

 

“I’m not going to argue with you, but I think maybe you should. Think about it.”

 

With that Raj left. I remained seated and I thought about what he had said. But I couldn’t… I couldn’t speak to Arnav. What would I say to him? I don’t even know how he feels about me. Would he mad at me that I left him, or would he react indifferently?

I needed to get my head straight. I needed to get everything I was feeling down. I needed to write a letter to jiji.

 

*****

 

“Dear my pyaari Jiji,

I hope this letter finds you in good health and I hope you’re really happy. It was about time I wrote you another letter any way, but I’m writing this letter to you as a way of trying to clear my own head.

I was out today, and I thought I saw Arnav at the mall. I know, crazy right? At first I thought maybe I was hallucinating, maybe because I’ve been missing him so much that I had started seeing him. But after I paid close attention, I realised that he really was there.

Now I would love to say that I handled the matter well, but I really didn’t. I hid and then I ran away, hoping that he didn’t see me.

I was out with my friend, the one who’s house I am staying at as a paying guest. I told him that I saw Arnav and I saw how I reacted. He thinks that I should try and reach out to him, maybe speak to him, but jiji, I really don’t know what to do.

You know how I feel about him, you know I still care for him. But I don’t know how he feels about me. What if I do try to speak to him and he completely shuts me out? What if he really has moved on with life and doesn’t want to have anything to do with me? I’m scared jiji. Part of me wants to speak to him, but at the same time, I’m scared that he doesn’t want to have anything to do with me. Being away from him hurts in one way, but to be rejected by him would hurt even more I think. I can’t just drop into his life again. I can’t, can I?

I honestly don’t know what to do. I just feel like too much time has passed and that I’ve left it all too late. Maybe if all this had happened a couple of years ago, then maybe I would have approached him, maybe I would have tried to speak to him. But now… After over six years, I don’t think I can do that to him.

I don’t know what to do.

I hope you are well jiji and I hope everyone at home is well too. I miss you all so much and I really do wish I could come to visit. Maybe I will do. I don’t know. But for now, please know that I think about you all all the time and that I miss you more than anyone else.

Also, please don’t tell Arnav about this letter. Please don’t tell him that I saw him. Don’t alert him that we are in the same place. I don’t want him to find me. Please jiji, please, don’t tell him.

Love you lots and lots,
Always thinking of you.
Yours, Khushi.”

 

Signing off my letter, I read it back to make sure that it was perfect and then took an envelope out of my desk along with a stamp. I would send this off first thing on Monday and jiji should get it by Wednesday. I was unsure about whether or not to actually mention that I saw him, just in case she alerted him, but this was my jiji. She wouldn’t do that. She wouldn’t say anything to him.

 

*****

A few days had passed since I had sent the letter off to jiji. Maybe she would have received it by now. I wish I had given her a number so that I could talk to her, but I knew that was dangerous. With a number they would have a direct link to track me down. At least with a letter, even now that I had made it clear that me and Arnav were in the same city, it would still be hard to find me even if anyone tried. There are a crazy amount of people in Mumbai and it’s also a huge city. It would take ages for them to find me. Plus I know for a fact that I am not the only Khushi here. So even if they tried to locate me using my name, it would take a long time.

When I arrived in Mumbai, I had decided to drop both my maiden and my married name. So here, I wasn’t Khushi Kumari Gupta, or Khushi Kumari Gupta Singh Raizada. Here I was just Khushi Singhania. Singhania is Raj and Veera mausi’s surname and I had asked them before using it. They didn’t mind. So if any of my family did try to find me, they’d have to go through all the Khushi’s to find me. I had done the same with Arushi. I hadn’t given her my maiden name or Arnav’s name. She was Arushi Signhania. Initially, I had thought of naming her Arushi Singh Raizada, but then I realised that her name would draw too much attention to her. To have the Raizada name, someone would have alerted the Raizada’s and they would have found us.

With all the bases covered, I believe that we are relatively safe. There’s no way Arnav would be able to find us even if he did know we were here. We were safe. He wouldn’t be able to find us…

Jalebi ~ Part 27

By the time Arnav arrived home, he was a wreck. His eyes were bloodshot and he was in a foul mood. The moment he stepped through the door, Anjali came rushing over to him.

 

“Chote! Where on earth have you been? You went out hours ago, saying you just needed to pick up a new laptop charger and there’s been no news from you since. Do you know how many times I’ve called you? Do you know how worried I was?”

 

Arnav listened to everything his sister had to say, not entirely taking in a word she was saying. Anjali realised that Arnav’s attention was somewhere else. Taking a good look at him, she saw his red, puffy eyes.

Taking his arm, Anjali led Arnav into the living room, sat him down on the sofa and then sat down beside him.

 

“Chote, what’s the matter?”

 

Arnav remained stoic for a moment before responding by laying down on the sofa, his head on his sisters lap and his arms around her.

 

“My life is over Di”.

 

Completely breaking down, Anjali looked down at Arnav completely alarmed. She couldn’t remember the last time her brother broke down in this manner. Arnav usually always hid his emotions from her, tried to be tough for her, but right now…

Anjali stroked his hair as he cried. Nani came outside, hearing the commotion followed by Shyam and Manorama.

 

Mami came over to Arnav and sat on the sofa by his feet, her hand on his back.

 

“Arnav bitwa, what happens?”

 

Calming down slightly, Arnav wiped his eyes and sat up.

 

“I saw Khushi…”

 

The Raizada women and Shyam all looked between each other, not entirely sure how they should proceed with the conversation.

 

“Kya? Khushi’s back? Did you speak to her? What did she say? Chote, did she say anything to you?”

 

Shaking his head, Arnav looked at his Di and took her hands in his own.

 

“She’s engaged.”

 

Mami gasped as did Anjali. Nani turned to Shyam, her eyes wide as she realised what was happening here.

 

“She’s engaged? But how Saale Saab? Only a few weeks ago you and her were talking about marriage. How in this short time has she managed to go and get herself engaged?”

“She’s engaged to her childhood friend jijaji. The man her parents had initially picked for her. I met him when we went to London and you don’t understand how smug he was. I want to kill him!”

 

Anger irrupted within Arnav. How could she actually do that to him? How could she move on just like that? Did their relationship really mean that little to her? Turning back to his sister, Anjali could see the anger in his eyes.

 

“Did she not tell you as well Di that she wanted to spend her life with me? Then how could she do this? She says I’ve deceived her, but what has she done? She promised herself to me and now she’s with another man. How could she do that to me?”

 

Getting to his feet, Arnav stormed off towards his bedroom. The Raizada’s all looked between each other, unsure of how they needed to deal with this issue.

 

“Maybe I should go and speak to Khushi. Tell her that whatever happened wasn’t down to Chote.”

”She won’t believe you Rani Sahiba. I’m sure Saale Saab would have tried his best to make her listen to him. But she like him is also hard headed. I don’t think any of us getting involved will have any benefit.”

“But Chote… He’s so broken. We have to do something before he does something stupid. I’ve never seen him this upset, or this angry.”

”I think we just need to give him some time to cool down and come to terms with everything.”

“He’s never loved anyone the way he loves Khushi and I don’t think he’ll ever love anyone else as much as he loves her. I don’t think he’ll ever fully come to terms with what has happened…”

 

*****

 

Pacing his bedroom, Arnav tried to come up with a plan. He needed to do something. Anything! He couldn’t just sit and wait for her to go and get married to someone else. He needed to fight for her. But his options were limited and he didn’t know what to do. He had thought that by telling her the truth about Akash, she would maybe reconsider, but she hadn’t. There had to be something! Running his hand through his hair, Arnav yanked the ends of his hair in frustration. Why was this happening!?

 

*****

 

Dinner was served and ready. The Raizada family all sat around waiting for Arnav to come down before they could start eating. Hari Prakash emerged from Arnav’s bedroom and made his way down to the dining room.

 

“Arnav Bhaiya has said that he doesn’t want to eat now, you all should continue.”

“Has Chote had something to eat at least? If he doesn’t eat he’s going to fall ill?”

“I took him some coffee and some toast a little while ago.”

”Okay. Leave him gor now, I’ll take some food to him later.”

 

Leaving the dining area, Anjali turned to her husband and sighed.

 

“Shyam ji, we have to do something, I can’t see Chote like this.”

 

Akash, who had been absent when Arnav had returned home, looked up from his food.

 

“What happened to bhai now?”

 

Turning her attention to Akash, Anjali couldn’t believe that Akash was asking this question. After all, he was the main reason why Arnav was in this condition. She wanted to say something, make it known to the family that Akash was the cause of Arnav’s plight, but she stopped herself. Her Chote didn’t want the family to know about Akash and she was going to respect his wishes.

 

“Chote saw Khushi earlier and it didn’t go well.”

 

Looking up from her food, Payal’s eyes widened.

 

“Khushi’s back?”

”Yes. Chote didn’t say when she returned, but yes she’s back and she’s engaged. Did you know about that?”

”What? She’s engaged? To who? How could she get engaged and not tell me about it?”

 

Anjali felt sorry for Payal, she looked genuinely hurt and stressed about the fact that Khushi was engaged to someone and she didn’t know about it. Telling Payal everything Arnav had told her, Anjali watched as her expression fell.

 

“I can’t believe… But she loves Arnav ji so much. I can’t believe she… Why would she do this to herself?”

“I don’t know Payal. I really don’t know.”

”Di, do you think I should talk to her? Explain to her about bhai’s condition? If she knows how much he is hurting, surely she’d…”

 

Intervening, Akash looked up from his food and stopped Payal in her tracks.

 

“Don’t you dare! You are not to say anything to Khushi. She’s made her decision and it seems as though she is sticking to it. If she cared for bhai at all, she never would have gotten engaged to someone else in the first place. If she’s can do that’s to bhai, she doesn’t deserve him. Besides, with which right do you want to go and talk to her? The both of you shared everything and she didn’t even tell you about her engagement, that should tell you how she sees you. You are to say nothing to her Payal, I forbid it.”

 

Payal looked slightly taken aback. Akash had never spoken to her like that and she didn’t understand why he was speaking like that now.

 

Anjali watched Payal and Akash’s exchange closely and her heart went out for Payal who looked hurt and confused. On one hand she’d just found out that her cousin had made a huge decision regarding what she was going to do with her life without telling her, and on the other hand, her husband was giving her a hard time.

 

“Why are you being like this? She’s my sister and despite her decision not to tell me, I still love her. I’m sorry Akash, but I can’t just turn my back to her, I know she’s going through a hard time too.”

“Payal Bitya is absolutely correct. Khushi is hurting too and she can’t just get upset with her and turn her back from her. Payal, I think you should calm Khushi and see what she has to say.”

 

“Ji Dadiji.”

 

Leaving the table, Payal went upstairs to make her call. Akash remained at the table, his hands fidgeting under the table. What if Arnav had told Khushi that he was the one who had caused the hand over of the business? What if Khushi told Payal? It could cause problems in their relationship. But seeing how Dadi had spoken, he didn’t think he would be able to stop Payal. He just had to hope for the best that Arnav hadn’t told Khushi anything.

 

*****

 

Both Arnav’s bedroom and the study were a mess. Papers had been thrown across both rooms, a couple of vases had been broken… Arnav had been through the papers over and over and over again to the point where he had almost memories the whole file. There was nothing in there that was going to help him give Khushi her business back without involving Akash.

Arnav was now sat in their little bar, with a glass of vodka. Anjali had followed the trail of mess and saw her brother downing the glass of alcohol in one go.

 

“Chote! What are you doing?”

 

Turning around, he saw Anjali walk in, her eyes wide with shock.

 

“I’m drinking Di. What does it look like?”

“But you don’t drink like this. Chote come on, stop.”

 

Taking the bottle of vodka away from Arnav, Anjali took her brothers face in. He looked tired and angry and confused and broken.

 

“You can’t do this to yourself Chote.”

“What’s the point Di? What am I living for right now? My brother who I’ve always loved had taken the one thing I loved most in my life. My business isn’t mine any more and the woman I love… She’s someone else’s. I have nothing Di. Just this bottle of vodka.”

 

He made to take the bottle from Anjali but she had it away from him.

 

“Chote, I know your hurting, but this behaviour needs to stop right now. We will find a way to get this sorted…”

“But I won’t get Khushi back.”

 

It was evident that he was really struggling to deal with what was happening to him. Anjali felt broken herself. She didn’t know how to help her brother.

 

“You know Di, back in high school, I never really noticed her. But when I saw her at the reunion last year, I was completely blown away by her. And then I started to get to know her and I started to fall in love with her. It took me ages and ages to make her accept my feelings and give our relationship and chance but… It was all for nothing.”

 

Resting his head against the bar, Anjali pat her brother on the shoulder. She didn’t know how to comfort him, didn’t know what the right thing was to say. As much as she felt her brothers pain, she did understand what was going through Khushi’s head. She’d taken a chance on Arnav and subsequently had lost everything she had ever worked for. As much as Anjali wanted to go and talk to her, to try and get her to reconsider, she knew that Khushi’s feelings right now and the way she was behaving, were completely justified.

 

“Chote, go to bed. It’s been a long day for you.”

 

Nodding, Arnav got to his feet, stumbling slightly as he got up. Anjali took hold of his arm and he held onto her for dear life as she guided him towards his bedroom.

Upon arriving at his room, Arnav crashed onto his bed the moment he saw it. Moments later he was fast asleep. Taking his shoes off and tucking his in, Anjali looked at her brother who was completely exhausted and completely heart broken. She needed to do something to help his sort all this, but what and how? How could she get Khushi to reconsider, especially now when she was engaged to someone else. Making sure Arnav was asleep, Anjali backed out of his bedroom and made her way towards Payal’s.

Knocking on Payal’s door, she waited to be let inside.

 

“Come in.”

 

Pushing the door open, Anjali saw Payal quickly wipe her tears away and she sat up a little straighter on the edge of the bed.

 

“Di? Did you need something?”

”Were you able to get hold of Khushi?”

 

Anjali watched as Payal’s shoulders slumped slightly but she nodded.

 

“She didn’t say much, but she’s invited me round to her apartment so that I can meet Rohan. Di, this isn’t right! Nothing about any of this feels right. We need to do something! Khushi can’t marry Rohan, I know her, her heart belong to and with Bhai. If we don’t do something, she’ll go on to making the biggest mistake of her life.”

”I know Payal, but I don’t know what we can do.”

“Anything Di. We can do anything but we need to do it soon. I’m worried Khushi is going to speed up the wedding process now that she knows we all know. I know what she thinks like, she’s going to try to run further away.”

 

Sitting down beside Payal, Anjali took Payal’s hand into her own.

 

“We’re going to sort this mess, and we’re going to get Khushi back for Chote. I can’t see my brother like this.”

 

Anjali felt a new power within her. Akash had messed with her Chote’s life and had ruined everything for him. But she wasn’t going to let him win. She was going to get Khushi her business back and Khushi back for Arnav, even if it was the last thing she ever did.

Unwanted ~ Part 30

 

Arnav

 

Happy birthday to me! I’ve reached the grand old age of 33 and don’t have a lot to show for myself. I mean obviously I have my business empire, but other than that, not a lot. I don’t know where my wife is and my life hasn’t really progressed much in the last six years.

But for the first time in six years, I’m actually looking forward to my birthday. I get to spend the day around a group of young people who I have gotten very attached to. In order to celebrate, I have brought some chocolates to share with the kids.

It’s going to be a good day, I could tell.

 

*****

 

Just before the children went for their lunch, I decided to distribute the chocolates that I had brought with me.

 

“So it’s my birthday today and I have brought some chocolates for everyone!”

 

There was a slight yelp of joy as I started going round each desk, letting each child pick a chocolate. One by one I went through them all until I reached Arushi. Now unlike all the other kids, she hadn’t been anticipating my arrival with the treats. She was sat at her desk, drawing what looked like dresses.

 

“Here you go Arushi, choose one.”

“No thank you sir.”

“Why not? Don’t you like chocolate?”

“I do, but I’m not allowed to have normal chocolate. I can only eat special chocolate my mama buys me.”

“Why’s that?”

“I have sugar ki bimaari.”

“You’re diabetic?”

 

I could feel my eyes widen as I waited for a response from her. She nodded her little head just as the bell went off, signalling lunchtime.

I dismissed the children once I was sure that another member of staff was outside, ready to take them. I watched Arushi slowly put her things away.

 

“But you eat jalebis?”

“My mama makes me special ones, just for me.”

“I’m diabetic too.”

 

Getting to her feet, she rushed over to the door where her friend was waiting for her. Turning around, she gave me a little wave.

 

“I’ll tell my mama to make some special ones for you too sir.”

 

*****

 

All throughout lunchtime, I couldn’t stop thinking about Arushi and the little revelation that she had made. I should’ve known. As her teacher, I should’ve known that she was diabetic.

But that wasn’t all. There was something else about this matter that was troubling me and I didn’t know what it was and why.

I knew that children could get diabetes, but Arushi was so young? She’s only 5? It wasn’t fair that such a young child should have diabetes. They should be able to enjoy their life, eat as much sugar as they want without having to think anything of it. They shouldn’t have to turn down sweets and chocolates. It wasn’t fair.

 

*****

 

At the end of the day, I watched as all the children got picked up by their parents. Once all my kids were gone, I was ready to go back to my classroom when I saw Arushi still sat on the small wall, waiting.

I made my way over to the wall and sat down on it beside her.

 

“Your mama isn’t here yet?”

“Mama has work so she can’t get me any way. But Priya wasn’t here today so Naina aunty hasn’t come either.”

“So who are you waiting for?”

 

Arushi shrugged her shoulders as she swung her little feet.

 

“Have you always had diabetes Arushi?”

 

She nodded without looking up.

 

“Does your mum have diabetes?”

 

Shaking her head, she looked up at me.

 

“Mama said papa has diabetes. That’s why she knows how to make special jalebis. She used to make it for papa all the time.”

“Oh, I see.”

 

Turning around, she looked back towards the main gate. There were still quite a lot of children around.

 

“Do you want me to call home to make sure that someone is coming to take you?”

“It’s okay. Someone always comes.”

 

We sat in silence for a while.

 

“Do you have any plans of what to do when you go home?”

“No. Play with mama and then dinner and then bed maybe.”

“Do you get a lot of time to play with your mama?”

“Lots and lots of time.”

 

Her face lit up as we spoke about her mother and it was evident that they shared a close relationship. It must be hard for her mother, being a single parent…

 

“Are you going to do anything when you go home sir? On my birthday, mama takes me to the park!”

“When I go home, I’ll probably call my family and then plan next weeks lessons.”

“No cake?”

“I live on my own, so no cake.”

“Do you not have any family?”

 

If this were an adult asking, I would find them to be very rude and intrusive. But Arushi was just a child and she was curious.

 

“I do, but my family live in Delhi. So I can’t see them for my birthday.”

“Oh… Mama says she used to live in Delhi before, a long time ago. My papa too.”

 

So Arushi’s parents lived in Delhi? Could it be possible that I knew her parents? Shaking my head, I pushed the thought away. I was being crazy. Delhi was huge and there were tonnes and tonnes of people. The chances of actually knowing her parents were slim to none.

 

“Did I tell you sir, it’s my dad’s birthday today too! Me and mama did pooja for papa’s birthday in the morning.”

“Really? That’s such a coincidence!”

 

So Arushi’s father had the same birthday as me. I wanted to ask if she had spoken to her father, or made him a card to wish him, but I still hadn’t established if Arushi’s parents were separated or if her father was no longer alive. If he wasn’t alive, I didn’t want to upset her by asking if she’d spoke to him.

Something about this child intrigued me and I wanted to know more about her and her family. But how was I to do that?

Looking over her shoulder once more, I saw Arushi’s face light up as she saw a man in the distance.

 

“Arushi!”

 

The man called out and Arushi jumped to her feet, grabbing her bag that was on the floor.

 

“I have to go now sir!”

“Is that someone to pick you up?”

 

She nodded her little head frantically as she ran round the wall and started making her way down the gates. I watched as she ran off. The man looked a similar age to me, maybe slightly shorter than me. I watched as he stopped where he was, a smile on his face as his eyes fixed on the little girl running towards him.

I kept watching, he knelt down slightly as Arushi approached and she threw her little arms around him, and he lifted her up.

Who was this man? I knew Arushi’s dad was out of the picture, but who was this? Whoever it was, it was evident that he and Arushi shared a close bond. They both looked delighted to be together as they made their way down the path and out the school gates.
I had never thought that Arushi may have any other family other than her mother. This man could be her uncle.

Shaking my head, I got off the wall and made my way back tinny classroom. I was getting far too invested…

 

*****

 

When I finally got home that evening, the first thing I did was check my phone for all my messages. There was a whole stack from friends and employees wishing me a happy birthday. And then of course there was a whole lot of messages from my family.

 

Turning FaceTime on, I gave Di a call. She answered on the second ring.

 

“Hi Di.”

“Happy birthday Chote!”

“Thanks Di. How have you been?”

“I’ve been alright, you?”

“I’ve been good too. Just keeping myself busy.”

“When are you coming back Chote? We’re all really missing you.”

“I’m missing you guys too. I should be able to start thinking about coming back soon. Veer has been interviewing potential candidates like crazy. But it’s midterm now. So anyone he hires, they won’t be able to start until the new term begins.”

“That’s fine, there’s only a few weeks left.”

 

There was a pause as me and Di just took each other in. They hadn’t been apart for this long in a very long time and Arnav could tell it was unsettling Anjali.

 

“Di, I promise, I’ll be back soon. Or why don’t you come and visit me for a few days?”

“I’d love to. But Shalini has school and I can’t just leave her and come.”

“I understand Di.”

 

Me and Di made small talk. We spoke for a while. For the first time in a long time, me and Di were able to have a long conversation without arguing.

Once we were done, she passed the phone over to Akash and then to Nani and then back to Di.

 

“I was going to pass the phone to Nimisha, but she’s gone out with Pari. Maybe you can call them later, or they’ll call you?”

 

I nodded. I didn’t want to argue with Di by saying that I wasn’t going to call them. Wishing me a happy birthday once more, Di ended the call and I put my phone aside.

My time here really was almost up. There was only about another 2 weeks of the term and then the kids would go on holiday. And when they came back, they would have a new teacher.

As much as I was glad to be almost done, it was also hard. I’d really started enjoying teaching and I’d really grown fond of the kids around me. They’d become a part of my life and I loved seeing how far they’d come in terms of their education since I first starts with them.

When I’d arrived they were learning the letters H, I and J. Now, most of them knew the entire alphabet! We’d come a long way and my journey with them was almost at its ends.
As much as I had achieved a lot, I also didn’t achieve a lot. I had no new information regarding Khushi, no new leads. Nothing. Mumbai was cold. There was no sign of Khushi here. But regardless of the that, my heart told me that I needed to be here, that I was close.

Feelings were telling me to stay, the facts were telling me to move along.

Laying back in my bed, I looked up at the ceiling. If only a sign would just fall from the sky. But of course, nothing came.

Sighing, I got comfortable in bed, letting myself rest. Shutting my eyes, I was ready to take a short nap.

 

Just as I was about to drift off, a thought hit me.

Nimisha and Pari hadn’t called me today.

Now of course, to some this wouldn’t seem like a big deal, but to me, this was something noteworthy.

When I’d first moved here, Nimisha called me constantly. Sometimes with the pretence that she was missing me, other times saying Pari needed to talk to me.

As time went on, she called less and less frequently. But what stood out about today was that it was my birthday. Nimisha would never miss my birthday. Looking at the clock, I realised it was almost 7. The entire day was almost done and Nimi hasn’t called me? In a bit, Pari would go to sleep and wouldn’t be able to speak to me?

That was strange. It seemed out of character. And Di had said they were out. Where could they be at this time of evening?

Call me paranoid but something wasn’t fitting for me. Something was going on. Otherwise Nimisha wouldn’t pass up the opportunity of making a song and dance about our relationship. Something wasn’t right. Something was going on. But I didn’t know how I felt about it. Do I feel happy that Nimisha has left me alone, or should I be suspicious as to what she’s up to?

All of a sudden, I felt torn all over again. Something wasn’t right. I knew.

Jalebi ~ Part 26

 

“I’m engaged Arnav.”

 

Looking at the ring on Khushi’s finger and then looking between her and Rohan, it took Arnav a few minutes to process it all.

 

“Wait what?”

“I should’ve told you as soon as I saw you…

“Yes, yes you should have! How could you leave like that and come back engaged? Did you not think about me for even a moment? Did you not remember the fact that I wanted to marry you? How did you forget about everything we’d been through? How could you?”

“How could I? How could I?!”

 

Khushi felt her patience slipping away from her, her anger rising. Rohan took hold of her arm, whispered how she needed to calm down. But she wasn’t having it.

 

“I could do this because you deceived me! You stole my business from me! And you have the audacity to ask me how dare I?”

“Khushi…”

“I gave myself to you after trying to stay away from you. It took me ages to open myself up to you and that’s how you repaid me…”

“I didn’t do anything! It was Akash!”

 

Khushi stopped for a moment. What did he say?

“Jijaji?”

“Yes. It was all his master plan. Right from the moment he called you back for the reunion he had this plan. I knew about it from the start but I never thought it was a good idea. But initially I went with him, but only to an extent. Then I started to work with you, got to know you, and I couldn’t do it, I told him I wanted out. And then things really started changing between us and I…”

“Why didn’t you say no from the start?”

“I didn’t think much of it, I didn’t think Akash was being serious. And then I realised he was and that’s when I said no.”

 

Raising her hand to head, Khushi tried to take in everything that she’d just learnt. How could Akash do that to her? How could he even think about doing something like that?

 

“But Payal…”

“He loves Payal truly…”

“How could he do that to me when he’s always been trying to get into bed with my cousin. Did he not think…”

“I don’t know Khushi. I don’t know his logic behind it all. But I need you to know it wasn’t me. I didn’t even know when he created the papers. I’d already made it clear to him long before that we needed to put a stop to the plan. And he agreed. I honestly thought he was going to back off…”

 

Rohan who had been standing beside Khushi patiently finally started to lose his cool. He’d had enough of this.

 

“Okay. Right, you’ve said you’re bit, you’ve done what you needed to do, but it doesn’t change what’s happened. Whether it was your plan or someone else’s, Khushi no longer has her business. I don’t think there’s much else to be said.”

“I’d appreciate it if you didn’t come between us.”

“I’m afraid I have to be between you. Khushi’s my fiancé and I need to make sure you’re not saying anything to trouble her.”

 

Arnav moved up to Rohan. Who the hell did he think he was? Khushi sensed the tension between the two men and moved between them.

 

“Look, I don’t need you two to start arguing. Arnav, I appreciate your attempts to sort things, but… There’s nothing that can be done. You can’t give me Khushiyan back… As for us… I can’t trust you Arnav, I’m sorry. I know it sounds harsh, given everything that you’ve told me, but I can’t… I’m sorry. I’ve moved on with me life, I’ve moved on with Rohan, and I want you to respect my decision.”

“So what? That’s it for us?”

“I told you before I left, it was over between us.”

 

Tears pricked in both Arnav and Khushi’s eyes. She blinked them away as Rohan wrapped an arm around her. Arnav took a step closer to Khushi.

 

“I love you… I can’t live without you.”

 

She looked at him, wanting to move closer to him and wipe his tears away. But she was aware of Rohan holding her close. In her heart she knew she still loved him but…

 

“I’m sorry Arnav… We spent some beautiful moments together and I guess they and you will always be special. But it was always meant to be me and Rohan. I guess I got confused along the way. I’m not confused now and Rohan has accepted my past with you…”

 

Rohan and Khushi both watched as Arnav’s body deflated, he looked completely defeated. It pulled at Khushi’s heart. She’d never seen him like this. He looked so broken, so lost. She placed a hand on his shoulder.

 

“I’m sorry… But you will find someone for yourself, someone who will love you and care for you the way Rohan loves and cares for me.”

“I can’t be here…”

 

Holding back the tears that were threatening to fall, Arnav tried to hold himself together. He didn’t want to cry in front of her any more, and definitely not in front of Rohan.

 

“I’m sorry I came here.”

“Arnav…”

 

He brushed past both Khushi and Rohan and made his way over to the door. One hand on the door handle, he turned around and took one last look at Khushi.

 

“Goodbye Khushi.”

 

And with that, he was gone. Khushi wanted to go after Arnav, to stop him, to tell him she still cared for him and that she still wanted to be with him. But she knew she couldn’t do that.

Tears started falling, and Rohan pulled Khushi into a hug, holding her close to himself. Brushing him off, Khushi moved away from him and rushed into her bedroom, shutting the door behind herself. Throwing herself onto the bed, Khushi cried. Let it all out. This wasn’t fair. She had met someone she truly loved and who truly loved her too, but she couldn’t be with him. It wasn’t fair, this wasn’t how t was meant to be.

Khushi lay in bed, and she recalled all the moments she and Arnav had shared. She remembered all the kisses they had shared, the moment they had stolen during Payal and Akash’s wedding. She remembered their first night together, how gentle he’d been with her, how he kept making sure that she was okay, that this was still what she wanted.

Then she remembered their second night together. She remembered how she’d felt, being there below his body while he moved over her, kissing every inch of her body, touching her naked skin… She remembered how it had felt being so close to him, being one with him, having his body in hers…

Wiping her tears away, she forced herself to remember why they couldn’t be together, why she had made the decision to leave him. Yes it did change things, knowing that this was Akash’s plan and not Arnav’s. But Arnav should have said no from the start, he should have put his foot down because he knew it was wrong, morally, to do that to someone.

No, she couldn’t cry over not having Arnav any more. She wasn’t being fair on herself or Rohan. Rohan had accepted her, knowing everything about hers and Arnav’s relationship.

Wiping her tears away, Khushi sat up in bed and recalled everything that had happened when she arrived back in London.

 

*Flashback*

 

Arriving at Heathrow airport, Khushi pulled her sunglasses over her eyes to cover her puffy eyes. She had cried almost the entire flight, unable to understand how and why this was happening.

Once she collected her luggage and was ready to leave, she called for a taxi and went straight to her office.

The security team at the entrance of her office was the ones she was used to and they recognised her the moment they saw her and let her in.

Walking into the office, her assistant came rushing over to her.

 

“Ma’am! What are you doing here all of a sudden? But more importantly what’s happening with ownership? Apparently you have signed over all rights?”

“I need to talk to everyone from legal. Find out if they’re free and even if they aren’t arrange a meeting now.”

“Yes ma’am, but do you want to maybe freshen up first, you look exhausted.”

“Please just do as I’ve asked you to do.”

 

The assistant rushed off and Khushi made her way up to her office, greeting everyone politely as she passed them. Getting to her office, Khushi shut the door behind her before taking a look at herself in the mirror. She looked a wreck. Her eyes were bloodshot, her face dry and tired looking.

 

Sorting herself out a bit, she looked through the papers that Mohit had sent over to her, trying to find a loophole, something, anything that would help her get her business back. But she couldn’t find anything.

After waiting about half an hour, Khushi’s assistant reappeared, telling Khushi that he had managed to get a meeting sorted with the legal team and that it would take place in half an hours time.

Thanking him, Khushi dismissed him once more. Picking her phone up, she noticed that she had a tonne of missed calls and text messages from Arnav. She read the previews, but didn’t bother to open the messages. She didn’t have anything to say to him.

Sitting through the meeting with legal, it became clear very early on that nothing much could be done. They had gone through the papers in detail, trying to find anything that could help them, but it was clear that there wasn’t a lot that could be done.

When Khushi left the office, she felt completely deflated. She had hoped with all her heart that her legal time would be able to find something, anything. But it seemed as though if Arnav didn’t sign things over, she wouldn’t be able to get her business back.
Leaving the office, Khushi got another taxi to take her home. Getting to her house, she couldn’t help but feel broke. She hadn’t been home alone for years and now to come back home to an empty house, when she really needed her family was not ideal.

Once Khushi was home and she’d had some time to freshen up, she called the only person she could think of at that point. Rohan.

As soon as Khushi put the phone down from Rohan, he arrived. He came with food and some flowers. The moment he walked in through the door, Khushi embraced him.

 

“Khushi? What’s going on?”

 

Explaining everything that had happened, Khushi couldn’t contain her tears. She told Rohan everything, telling him everything that had happened from the start to the end.

 

“Wait, so you were in a relationship with him? Were you together when I met you guys at the conference?”

“No we got together right after.”

“I can’t believe he’d do that to you.”

“I’m sorry Rohan. I know… Us… We always said we’d get married. And I went and…”

“Sh, it’s okay. There’s nothing wrong with exploring your options. But I think it’s clear now that our Jodi was predetermined for a reason. We were meant to be Khushi. I know you’ve just got out of a serious relationship, but I want you to know, I still want to marry you… Maybe one day when you’re ready…”

“I can’t even think about that right now Rohan. It’s too soon.”

“I know, I know.”

 

Rohan dropped the topic of their marriage and Khushi too attempted to cheer herself up so she wouldn’t have to discuss the matter any further. It was too soon to even think about spending her life with someone else. Up until yesterday, she had felt her future with Arnav was set and now to have that taken away… It was too much at one time.

 

*****

 

Time flew by faster than Khushi realised. She’d been back in the U.K. for over 2 weeks and her parents were back too. She had received a number of calls and messages from the Raizada’s. She knew that she should probably call them back and talk to them, but she couldn’t bring herself to do it. Rohan had been a dream and had paid Khushi a number of visits to make sure that she was settling back okay.

It was one afternoon when she was scrolling through the news app when she saw the news about the management of AR and Khushiyan was changing. Tapping on the headline, Khushi opened up the full article and read that both business which had previously been under Mr Arnav Singh Raizada, was now being passed over to Mr Akash Singh Raizada. No formal statement about the change had yet been made.

When Khushi read this, she felt like the ground beneath her had been pulled away. She couldn’t understand why Arnav would do that. Why would he take her business from her, only to hand it, and his own business, over to his brother?

It didn’t make any sense, none of it made any sense. Throwing her phone onto the bed, Khushi realised that enough was enough. She was done with Arnav. He’d deceived her and used her love for his own personal gains and his own motives. She was done with him. It was then she made the most rash decision of her life…

 

*****

 

A couple of days later, Khushi and Rohan were engaged. It was a small affair, with just their parents and their immediate family present. They didn’t want anyone else.
Rohan had asked Khushi over and over again if she was sure, if this is what she really wanted and she had assured him that it was.

 

“Why avoid the inevitable, let’s just get it done.”

 

Rohan had been confused but he didn’t want to question it. He wanted to be with Khushi and if she had finally decided it was time to make their relationship official, then he wasn’t going to question her. Rohan could tell that Khushi’s heart hadn’t been in the right place on their engagement day, and he had asked her over and over to make sure she was okay. She said she was.

Their engagement went on without a hitch, and it wasn’t until late that night when she was back in her own bedroom did she realise what she had really done. She’d given herself to someone else, promised someone else that she would be their wife… But in her heart, she knew she belonged with Arnav…

 

*Flashback end*

 

Looking at the diamond ring on her finger, Khushi realised that she couldn’t allow herself to bask in the past. She had made the decision to marry Rohan, and she knew it was a decision that her parents supported her on. She couldn’t back down or fall weak now. She owed it to herself, her parents and Rohan to make this work. Brushing away her tears, Khushi decided that enough really was enough. It was time to move on. To close the Arnav related chapter of her life and to proceed with her new journey with Rohan.

It was time for a new beginning.

Unwanted ~ Part 29

 

Khushi

 

By the time I got home from work, Arushi was already home and she was already changed out of her school clothes. Taking my little girl into my arms, I held her close and told her I missed her lots and lots.

 

“I missed you too mama.”

“So tell me, what did my princess do in school today.”

“Nothing.”

 

I could tell something wasn’t right. Normally she’d come running to me and she wouldn’t stop talking about her day. She’d tell me every little detail and if she missed something, it would mean needing to go through the whole story all over again.

 

“Arushi, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“Beta, you know you can’t hide anything from me.”

 

I watched as her expressions changed, it was evident she was trying to figure out what to do.

 

“I don’t want to go to school tomorrow and I don’t want to do the Father’s Day event.”

 

This came as a shock to me. Ever since Arushi had started school, she had never wanted to not go to school. Even when she was ill, it was a struggle to keep her home. So now for her to tell me she didn’t want to go, I knew something was wrong.

 

“Did something happen?”

 

She shook her head but I knew my daughter well enough to know she was lying. Taking her into my arms, I pulled her to myself and sat down on the floor with her on my lap.

 

“Tell me Ari, what happened?”

 

Looking up at me, I saw the little tears in the corner of her eyes. I watched as she tried to make them go away, but they didn’t and ended falling onto her little cheeks.

 

“The people in my class said I can’t do the Father’s Day presentation because I don’t have a real dad.”

 

I gasped and I held my baby close to myself. When did kids become so cruel? How could such young children be so mean to each other?

 

“Did you tell your teacher?”

“I did. He made them sit near the wall.”

“The naughty wall?”

 

She nodded.

 

“Baby, you have a dad. Raj is going to do to the presentation with you.”

“But he isn’t my real papa. Mama why can’t you call papa and tell him to come? I want my papa!”

“Arushi, you know your dad live far away and he’s very busy…”

“But can’t he come for one day? It’s not fair! I’ve never even seen my papa! Doesn’t he love me?”

 

I shook my head, holding her tighter.

 

“Of course he loves you baby! You’re our baby. But he just can’t…”

“He can’t come to see me.”

 

Arushi’s face fell and hen she wiggled out of my arms.

 

“Where are you going?”

“I’m going to play in my room.”

 

She walked away and I watched her go. What was I doing? For the first time ever, Arushi was questioning her fathers love for her. How could I do that to her? How could I keep lying to her like this? She thought Arnav didn’t love her, hence why he never came. How could I tell her that he doesn’t even know she exists? How do I tell my daughter that everything I’ve told her about why her dad isn’t with us is a lie?

 

“You’re realising how much of a mess you’ve made, aren’t you?”

 

Turning, I saw Raj stood in the doorway. When had he arrived. Stepping into the room, he looked over his shoulder before shutting the door behind himself.

 

“Ma is with Arushi.”

“Did you need something Raj?”

“No not really, but I couldn’t help but overhear your conversation with Arushi. Khushi, what are you doing to that poor little girl?

“What am I doing to her?”

“You’re torturing her! She’s only a five year old! She’s never met her real father, never even spoken to him…”

“You know why that is!”

“I do! And you know that I didn’t approve of your decision at the time and I still don’t. You left Arnav because you didn’t want to deprive his child of its fathers love, but look at what you’re doing to Arushi.”

“What am I doing to her?”

“You’re making her question whether her dad loves her or not! And I can’t blame her. The poor child has never seen it spoken to her dad. She doesn’t even know what he looks like or what his name is! He’s just a story to her.”

“She has you. So she’s feeling a bit down today, but come tomorrow, she’ll be completely over all this and she’ll be ready to rehearse for the Father’s Day event with you again.”

“Yes she has me, and I love her like my own, but at the end of the day she isn’t mine and she knows that. She knows her dad is out there somewhere and it’s understandable that she’s curious and wants to know more about him.”

 

I hated having this conversation. Why didn’t they just accept that I couldn’t let Arushi meet Arnav or let her speak to him. Why didn’t they understand that I couldn’t just torpedo into his life and drop Arushi on him?

 

“Khushi, listen to me. Arushi is still little. As she gets older she’s only going to have more and more questions. And as she gets older, your excuse he lives to far and is too busy isn’t going to bode well. Please Khushi, try and put this all aside.”

“I don’t understand what you expect me to do! I’ve said it time and time again, I can’t tell Arnav anything! Why don’t you understand?”

“Are you really that selfish Khushi? You’re thinking about the inconvenience it’ll cause you to tell Arnav the truth and you’re thinking about his happiness, but you’re completely overlooking Arushi’s feelings.”

“What inconvenience will it cause me? How dare you call me selfish? I’m thinking about everyone accept myself when I try to make decisions regarding this!”

 

My temper was rising fast. Raj was always so kind and supportive but today? Why was he speaking to me like this!

 

“You’re worried about all the questions you’ll have to answer if you go to Arnav now and tell him about his daughter. You know it’s going to put you in a tricky spot and you want to avoid that.”

“No, that’s not my reasoning at all! I’m thinking solely about Arnav and Arushi. Have you even for a moment thought about either of them? You’re only looking at the situation from one side, I’m looking at it from both. Do you think I enjoy being away from my husband, away from the love of my life? Do you think it’s easy for me to live my life? Do you think I enjoy seeing my fatherless daughter pine for her dad? No I don’t Raj! It kills me every time. But have you thought what would happen if I introduce Arushi to Arnav and he refuses to acknowledge her? What if I take her to him, but he doesn’t want anything to do with either of us?”

“Then Arushi will know her dad is scum and maybe it will be easier for you all to move on.”

“But yes, there is a slight selfishness to my decision too. What if I take Arushi to Arnav and he wants to keep her? What if he’s happy with Nimisha and his other child and he decides that he wants full custody for Arushi? What if he’s content with his life but having Arushi would make it better? He’s far more financially stable than I am. He would win a custody battle. I could lose my daughter. Have you thought of that?”

 

It was obvious from Raj’s expression that he hadn’t thought of that. That he hadn’t for a moment considered that taking Arushi to Arnav could mean us all losing her. But he knew as much as I did that this could be something that could happen.

We had all seen the pictures and the articles of Arnav and Nimisha on their wedding and at high profile events over the years. It seemed as though they were happy together. If I took Arushi to Arnav, he may decide he wants to keep our baby, but he doesn’t need me. He may throw me out of their lives and keep Arushi. And I couldn’t let that happen. Arushi was my reason to live, the reason I got up in the morning, the reason why I kept living this life. If I lost her…

 

“I hadn’t thought of that.”

“Well I had. Do you see why Raj it’s so hard to decide what to do?”

“I do but…”

“I don’t know what I’m going to do in the future, but for now I want to leave things as they are.”

 

It was obvious Raj wanted to say something else, but he didn’t. He just nodded, acknowledging what I had said. He looked down at his feet and the turned his attention back to me.

 

“So you still love him?”

 

This question threw me off slightly. I wasn’t expecting Raj to ask me something like that.
Sighing, I sat down on my bed and took the photo of Arnav out of my bedside drawer and looked at it. It was one of my favourite pictures of Arnav. It was one that I had taken of him on our honeymoon. It was one of the first pictures I took of him after we slept together for the first time.

 

“I’ve never stopped loving him, not even for a moment.”

 

Coming over to the bed, Raj sat down beside me.

 

“It’s been six years Khushi…”

“I know but I can’t just stop…”

“Let me finish what I was trying to say. I was saying, it’s been six years and you still love him as much as ever. Maybe you should try reaching out to him. If in over six years you haven’t been able to stop loving him, I don’t think you will ever be able to. For yourself and Arushi, maybe you need to reach out to him.”

 

Raj was right. It had been six years and not a moment went by when I didn’t think about Arnav. When I lay in my bed cold bed alone, I thought of Arnav. When I woke up, I thought about Arnav. When I looked at our daughter, I thought of him. He was always on my mind, always in my thoughts. To someone, it may seem insane. We were only together for six months and yet six years later I haven’t been able to get over him. But that’s just how it was. Those six months with him were the best six months of my life and I cherish every single moment from that time.

 

“I was happy with him. Our lives were going great, everything was perfect. It’s hard not to still love him when he never did anything to make me feel anything less for him. We never argued, he always took care of all my little needs and he was always there for me. How can I not still love him?”

 

I looked to Raj, awaiting his response. I could see that he saw things the way I saw them, that he understood what I meant.

 

“I understand.”

“In my heart, I hope that maybe one day I can reach out to him again. But as time goes on, I feel like it’s becoming harder and harder to reach out to him. He’s probably settled into his life now, he’s probably happy with Nimisha and their child. They may even have another child by now. I can’t enter his life again now. I could make a mess for him.”

“But what if he too has been struggling to move on, just as you have?”

“He got married to Nimisha. He wouldn’t have done that if he wasn’t ready to move on.”

 

Raj went silent once more. He knew I had a point.

 

“If he’s moved on, don’t you think maybe you should try too?”

“Maybe one day. But right now, I have Arushi and I want to be the best mother to her. I don’t want to divert my attention.”

“So what, you’re not ruling out the chances of getting married again?”

“I don’t know Raj. I honestly haven’t thought about it. I don’t want to get married again. Heck, I’m still married to Arnav. I can’t even think about getting married again. But maybe one day I will think about it seriously. But as of now, I’m fine as I am.”

 

He remained seated beside me for a while. He didn’t say anything, nor did he move. He turned to me, wanting to say something, but he must have thought against it because he turned away once more and slowly got to his feet.

 

“As long as your happy and you know what you’re doing, I can’t really say anything more.”

“I appreciate you’re concern for me and Arushi, but I think we’ll be okay.”

 

Nodding, Raj made his way over to the door and slowly opened it. He turned back to me, but then shook his head and turned away once more and left.

I did understand Raj’s concern, I really did. He cared for me and Arushi and so he wanted the best for the both of us. But at the end of the day, how I decided to go about this was my business.

I turned my attention back to my photograph of Arnav. I missed him, so, so much. Every single day, all the time. No matter what happened and how much changed, he would always be my other half, my better half. He completed me, made me whole. And even if he did have someone else and his own life now, for me, he would always be my other half. The man who completed me.

Whenever Raj and Veera asked me about getting married again, I always made it sound like it would be something that I would consider one day, but the truth was I don’t see myself ever thinking about getting married again. I don’t think I’ll ever stop loving Arnav or ever stop wanting to be with him. I could marry someone else, but at the end of the day, my heart belonged to Arnav, so it seemed pointless even considering marriage.

Yes, making Arushi understand would only get harder as she got older, but once she got to a certain age, I would tell her the truth. Why I left her dad and why he isn’t with us. Maybe one day she’d understand, but for now, what she knew was enough.

In my heart, there was still hope. Maybe one day things would get better and me, Arnav and Arushi could be a proper family. But until then, hope is all we have. I would carry on praying for him and for us and maybe Devi Maiyya would make things easier for us all. I had faith and I had hope. Maybe one day…

 

Just maybe.

Jalebi ~ Part 25

It had been weeks since anyone had last heard from Khushi. Arnav had given her time and space and had hoped that by this point she would have cooled down a little and would’ve spoken to him, but she hadn’t.

After handing over all business responsibility to Akash, Arnav found for the first time in a long time, he had time for himself. Legally, nothing had been signed over yet, but it was well known now that there had been a change in ownership and that Arnav was no longer in charge.

Arnav received a lot of phone calls, people he had previously worked with asking why he made such an abrupt decision. Many told him that he had made the wrong decision, but Arnav just stated that he had his reasons and for now, he was taking a step back.

To begin with, Akash had been more than happy to be the new owner of two successful fashion houses. He finally felt as though he got everything he deserved. He’d got his revenge on Khushi for rejecting him, and he’d punished Arnav for always having one up on him. Now he felt content with life. He also found that he was actually happy with Payal, glad that he had picked Payal in the end. She was understanding and supportive, he kind of woman one needed beside themselves when trying to be successful.

However, as time went on, Akash found that he was beginning to struggle to keep up. There were always so many files to check, so many meetings to attend, he barely had time for himself. He and Payal had been unable to go on honeymoon, and by the time he got home in the evening, he had no time for Payal because he was so tired.

He’d hoped that once he got into a routine with things and once he started getting on top of things, then it would be okay, but as time went on, he fell more and more behind. At one point he wanted to ask Arnav to step in and help, but he didn’t. He didn’t want Arnav to think he was incapable. No, he was going to make this work, no matter what happened.

 

*****

 

As Arnav walked into the kitchen, he saw Payal was pouring some juice. They were alone in the kitchen and Arnav took this opportunity to speak to her.

 

“Payal, can I speak to you for a moment?”

“Of course.”

“Payal… Have you heard from Khushi recently?”

“No I’m sorry, I haven’t. I’ve called her and left her messages, but she hasn’t been responding to anything.”

“Have you maybe spoken to her parents?”

“I spoke to Maasi the other day, but it seemed as though they had people at their house, there was so much noise. She said she’d call back but she never did. And every time that I’ve called since, no one has picked up.”

 

Running his hand through his hair, Arnav realised that maybe it was time to just go back to England. Maybe that was the best way to find her and speak to her.

 

“I’m going to try and get a flight out by the end of this week. It’s been over a month. I can’t wait any longer, I need to sort things with Khushi.”

“But bhai… Khushiyan.”

“I don’t know Payal, I’ve tried everything but you know I can’t get that sorted. I just need to make Khushi believe that I love her.”

“I’m sure she knows that but I don’t think that’s the issue here.”

“I don’t know how I’m going to work this out Payal, but I need to be near her. Not hearing from her is driving me insane.”

 

Nodding, Payal showed that she understood, because she did. Arnav didn’t tell her the truth about Akash because he didn’t want to cause any issues between them. He had been tempted, to be spiteful and to get back at Akash, but then he realised, he couldn’t do that because it would make him as bad as him.

Arnav headed back to his bedroom at pulled his phone out to call Aman.

 

“Hi Aman, find me a flight out to London… Any time before the end of the week… Okay, thank you.”

 

Ending the call Arnav realised that he was making the right decision. It had been well over a month. He couldn’t leave it any longer, he needed to work things out with Khushi.

 

*****

 

It was Thursday afternoon, Arnav was due to fly out the next morning. He had called both Khushi and her parents, tried to get an address, but no one answered. He had asked Payal for their details, which she provided, but even she wasn’t sure if Khushi would be living with her parents or not. Arnav wasn’t sure what to expect when he got back to England, but he knew he wouldn’t come back without Khushi by his side.

Walking out of one of the shops in the mall, Arnav bumped straight into a woman, making her drop the bags that was carrying.

 

“I’m so sor…”

 

Actually taking a look at the woman, Arnav realised that it was Khushi!

 

“Khushi? When did you…”

 

Gathering her things together, Khushi sorted herself out and turned away. Arnav took hold of her hand, pulling her back to himself.

 

“Arnav please…”

“Don’t make a scene Khushi. Let’s go somewhere and talk.”

“I’m not the one making a scene.”

“Khushi come on.”

 

Debating whether or not she should go with him, Khushi decided she may as well. If she didn’t speak to him, he would just keep trying and she needed to set him straight.
Arnav led Khushi out of the mall and towards his car. He moved over to open the door for her, but Khushi brushed his hand away and opened the door herself and got in. The moment she sat inside, all she could think about was that one time they had got intimate in the backseat. The first time they had given into their desires. If she could turn back time, Khushi knew she would take that day back. That’s when she really started developing feelings for him. If she hadn’t given into him that day, hadn’t lost control, then now, she would still have her business.

Getting settled Arnav got the car going, making their way out of the car park.

 

“Where should we go?”

“We can go and talk at my apartment?”

“Where are you staying?”

“I’m staying at the apartment I had bought before moving here.”

“Oh it’s done?”

“Yes, the work was complete last week, that’s why I came back.”

“When did you come back? Why didn’t you call me?”

 

Turning to face him, Khushi raised her eyebrow.

 

“Why would I call you? Why would I speak to you? Actually, what am I doing here right now?”

“Khushi please…”

“I got back 3 days ago. And honestly Arnav, I don’t think there’s anything left to talk about.”

 

Arnav said nothing. He didn’t want to start talking about anything in the car.
They drove in silence, Arnav keeping his focus on the road. Khushi sat beside him, her hands fidgeting constantly. When she was sure that Arnav wasn’t paying any attention to her, she turned to look at him. It seemed as though he’d lost some weight in the last month. His face looked a lot less full than the last time she saw him, and under his eyes he had dark circles. But other than that, he was still the most handsome man she’d ever seen in her life. Shaking the thought away, Khushi turned away. She couldn’t be thinking about Arnav that was any more.

The drive to Khushi’s apartment wasn’t a long one, but for Arnav, it felt endless. He felt as though they had been driving forever. As soon as he got the car parked, Khushi was out of the car, leading the way. Arnav followed her, watching her hips sway slightly, her butt swaying ever so slightly as she walked. How he wanted to grab hold of her hips and pull her back against himself. But he stopped himself from acting in such a manner. There would be plenty of time for all of that once they got everything sorted.

Getting into the lift, Khushi pushed the button for her floor and they began making their way up. Her apartment was only on the third floor, so before they knew it, they had already arrived.

Getting out of the lift, Khushi made her way over to her door and unlocked it. She stepped inside and held the door as Arnav followed her in.

 

“It’s quite a nice little place.”

“Thanks, take a seat. Let me just go and put this stuff in my room.”

 

Nodding, Arnav sat down at the sofa, taking in his surroundings while he waited for Khushi to reemerge from her bedroom. Would they be able to sort things out today? Would they be able to clear up their misunderstandings? He wondered if she’d let him make love to her, to let him show her how much she actually met to him.

Moments later, Khushi came out of her room and went into the kitchen area and put the kettle on. Arnav waited patiently as he listened to her pottering around. Maybe she was just nervous and was killing some time, he didn’t want to rush her.

A little bit of time passed and Khushi came out of the kitchen with tea, coffee and some snacks.

 

“Please help yourself.”

“I’m not hungry Khushi, I just want to talk to you.”

“Honestly Arnav, I really don’t think there is anything to talk about. Whatever happened, has happened. I saw on the news about how you handed everything over to Akash. I would ask you about that, but honestly, I am exhausted with all this. I want my business back, but more than anything I just want peace. I spoke to my team in England about what can be done. They looked at everything closely and told me that nothing much can be done. I can file a lawsuit against you, but it would be lengthy and intense and at the end of it I may not even get anything out of it considering I actually signed those papers. Moreover, if I took this to court, it could cause our relationship to come to light and I just…”

“You just what?”

“I know you were probably using me. That you probably got close to me so you could make me trust you. But what we shared… It was special to me even if it wasn’t for you. So I want to keep it between us. I don’t want some lawyer or some judge telling me I was an idiot for getting into a relationship with you. For being foolish and sleeping with you. I don’t need anyone to tell me that if I had hold of my feelings, then I would still have my business.”

 

She looked away and Arnav could tell thoughts of everything that they had shared was troubling her. Sliding off the sofa, Arnav moved towards Khushi before dropping onto his knees before her. Taking her hands into his own, he rested his head in her lap.

 

“Khushi, I need you. I’m incomplete without you. Khushi I love you!”

 

They remained in this position for a long time, Khushi running her fingers through Arnav’s hair, tears streaming down her face into his hair. Why was this happening? Why had their lives become so difficult?

Tears ran down Arnav’s cheeks and onto Khushi’s lap. He’d never let himself become this weak in front of anyone before, but he couldn’t hold his tears back. He needed to get Khushi back, he needed her.

Playing all their intimate moments back, Khushi remembered the intensity of their relationship, the feelings she’d felt for him, how she had felt when she was with him.

Coming to her senses first, Khushi wiped her tears away and started pulling Arnav away from herself.

 

“Sh, stop crying Arnav, please.”

“You need to trust me Khushi, I didn’t do anything to deceive you…”

“Whatever has happened, has happened. We can’t do anything to change what has happened.”

“Forgive me… Take me back.”

“I can’t Arnav.”

“Khushi I love you… I can’t live without you. The last month… You don’t know how it’s been. I hadn’t been able to focus on anything, I’ve been waiting for my phone to ring and for it to be you. I’ve been dying to hear your voice…”

“We have to move on.”

 

He pulled back, his eyes filled with tears.

 

“Does that mean you’ll take me back?”

 

He moved towards her again, hugging her tightly before placing kisses on her face.

 

“Arnav…”

“I love you so much.”

 

Khushi felt his hands move along her body, rushing from her hips up to her breasts all the while kissing every inch of her face.

Coming to her senses, Khushi pushed at Arnav, moving him away from herself before getting to her feet.

 

“Stop Arnav! Listen to me!”

 

He looked up at her, the smile that had started creeping onto his face, fell away. He got up, tried to reach out for her, but she took a step back, maintaining a distance between them.

 

“What’s wrong?”

“Just because I said that we need to move on doesn’t mean I want you back. I don’t trust you Arnav! As much as I want to believe you, I can’t.”

“What did you mean by moving in then?”

“I meant we’re over and we both need to accept that and move on with our lives. Start afresh.”

“Did our relationship mean nothing to you? Is it that easy for you to walk away? To forget about everything that was between us. That still is between us.”

“I’m trying to forget, please just let me.”

 

Arnav walked right up to Khushi, closing any distance between them.

 

“Are you telling me that if I’m this close to you, you don’t feel anything?”

“Arnav…”

 

He placed his hand on her cheek and Khushi’s eyes fluttered shut.

 

“Are you trying to tell me that when I’m this close and touching you like this, you don’t want me to kiss you?”

 

Her eyes remained shut, almost as though she didn’t hear what he had to say. Arnav moved in, closing his eyes, their lips a nail widths apart when the door opened behind them. Khushi came to her senses first and pushed Arnav away and moved away from him.

 

“Babe you home?”

“I… I’m here.”

 

Arnav’s eyes snapped open. Babe?

Someone called Khushi babe? Turning on the spot Arnav came face to face with Rohan.

 

“What is he doing here?”

“I could ask you the same Raizada. What are you doing here?”

 

Sensing the tension brewing between the two men, Khushi rushed between them, her back to Rohan, facing Arnav.

 

“Arnav… I should’ve told you as soon as I saw you…”

“Why is he here?”

“Listen. Arnav… I…”

 

She looked down before turning to Rohan who simply placed his arm around her waist, holding her close to himself. Taking a deep breath, Khushi looked up at Arnav again before holding her left hand out.

How had he missed it? How did he not notice…

 

“I’m engaged Arnav.”

Unwanted ~ Part 28

 

Arnav

 

I’d been working at the school for over a week now, and truth be told, I was really enjoying it! Really, really enjoying it.

I now understood why people wanted to work with kids. Every time one of the children learnt a new letter, it felt really good. Knowing that I had been able to teach them something which they would remember and use for the rest of their lives.

I wasn’t the best teachers out there, but I really felt like I was doing a good job. Who would have though, Arnav Singh Raizada, a class teacher of five year olds. But here I was and I didn’t plan on leaving any time soon.

When I first told Di what I was doing, she had a fit and demanded I come home right away. But I couldn’t. I couldn’t leave the kids hanging, not after they had been left by their previous teacher. And beside the kids, I felt like there was something holding me back. Something that was keeping me from going back to Delhi. My time here wasn’t done yet, I could feel it in my bones.

Di however thought this was all a load of rubbish and demanded that I come home. She said something about how Nimisha needed me at home. And then she started talking about how it was wrong, me being a teacher.

 

“How can you be a teacher to five year olds though Chote?”

“Why can’t I?”

“You have a daughter, who craves your love and attention. You have no time for her, but you can go and spend time educating other people’s kids. Do you know how insane that is?”

“Di, you always tell me I should embrace change and learn to find happiness in new things. I’ve done that! For the first time in years, I actually want to get out of bed every morning. These kids… They’ve lit up my dull, monochrome world and they’ve filled it with glorious technicolor. You should be happy for me!”

 

I remember how there was a pause after I said that. I heard Di sigh and then she told me that she was happy that I found happiness, but she’d be happier if I’d come home and spent time with my “wife and daughter.”

After all these years, I still couldn’t believe that Di didn’t realise that Pari wasn’t mine. Everyone in the household has started realising and considering that maybe I did know what I was talking about. That perhaps I was right. But Di… Maybe she just wanted to be oblivious to it all. And then there was Payal. She too couldn’t accept that Pari wasn’t mine. Between Payal and Di, I honestly felt like I was suffocating half the time.

Over the years, even Nimisha had stopped fighting for me to accept Pari. I mean she still did it, but not as much as she had done at the start. She’d stopped trying to convince me that Pari was mine. I think she finally realised that she wasn’t going to be able to fool me into believing that Pari was mine when we both knew she wasn’t.

I’d never really thought about having kids, but I always knew, if ever I did have a child, I would have a connection with them. I’d be able to feel it within me that they were mine. But with Pari, I felt nothing like that. Not even slightly. Pari was a great kid, and as I’ve said before, I do feel bad when I don’t acknowledge her the way she wants me to. But I can’t. I know I’m not her father, no matter what any DNA test reported.

I can’t give her the kind of love she wants and deserves. Maybe one day Nimisha would stop messing with the poor little girl and actually let her meet her father…

 

*****

 

As time went on and I spent more and more time with the kids in class, I began to grow more and more attached to them. I got to know them personally and learnt about their personalities. Even though they were only 5, most of them had already developed very individual personalities and it really showed through their art work that they did in class.

I enjoyed getting to know the kids. Getting to know their likes and dislikes, what annoyed them and what kind of things they enjoyed. It was an enjoyable process.

There was one child that made me struggle a bit though, and that child was little Arushi. There was something about this little girl that felt eerily familiar, like I’m supposed to know her. But none of my friends that live in Mumbai have a child her age, so it couldn’t be that. Nor do we have any relatives here. But regardless of all of that, there was something about this child that made me feel like I really, really should know who she is.

After observing the child for quite a long while, I finally put my finger on why she seemed so familiar. She looked like Khushi…

 

*****

 

The moment I got home that evening, I called Payal. For the rest of the day, I kept looking at Arushi and the more I looked at her, the more striking the resemblance between her and Khushi seemed. As I waited for Payal to answer the phone, I sat down on my bed and looked at the photograph of Khushi on the bedside table. Khushi’s eyes and Arushi’s eyes were almost identical. Of course it could be a coincidence but it seemed highly unlikely.

 

“Hello?”

“Payal, it’s me. I need to ask you something urgently.”

“Is everything okay bhai? What’s the matter?”

“There’s this little girl in my class, ever since I met her there’s been something crazy familiar about her and now… She… She looks like Khushi. The absolutely same eyes.”

“Really? Exactly like Khushi’s?”

“Identical. I spent so much time staring into Khushi’s eyes, I don’t know how I didn’t make the link earlier but now… I can’t stop seeing the resemblance. Do you and Khushi have any relatives in Mumbai? Maybe cousins or…”

 

There was a pause on Payal’s end and I waited patiently.

 

“Well… My Amma and Khushi’s amma were sisters and they didn’t have any other siblings. So there’s no chance that we have any cousins on that side. But I know Khushi’s babuji has siblings. But where they are and how many kids they have, I don’t know. No ones close to that side of Khushi’s family, not even her. So maybe this little girl is a relative but I don’t know…”

“Do you think Khushi might be here? With relatives?”

“I don’t know bhai. Honestly, I doubt it. I can’t really imagine Khushi trying to reach out to the side of the family that turned their back to her. Maybe it’s just a coincidence that that little girl looks like Khushi, or maybe it is a relative. But I don’t think Khushi is with any family members. I think she’d be on her own. I can’t see her turning to people who cut her out of their lives.”

 

I thought about it for a moment and realised that Payal was probably right. Khushi had never spoken about any other family, had never showed any interest in connecting with them.

 

“You’re probably right. Maybe I am looking too far into a coincidence.”

“I’m not saying that to kill your hope but…”

“No I understand. Thanks Payal. Has she written any letters to you since I’ve been here?”

“She hasn’t, but it’s been a while since I last heard from her so I think there should be a letter coming soon. I’ll let you know what she says when the letter arrives.”

“Thanks Payal. Take care of yourself, I’ll speak to you soon.”

 

Disconnecting the call, I put my phone down. I probably was paying too much attention to Arushi. Just because she looked a bit like Khushi didn’t mean she was related to Khushi in any way. And even if she was, it didn’t mean that Khushi was here.

Getting to my feet, I moved into the kitchen to make myself dinner. Another evening, another meal. On my own.

 

*****

 

“Arushi doesn’t have a real papa! What kind of presentation are you going to give for the Father’s Day event?”

 

I walked over to the kids, and the moment I approached them, they all went quiet.

 

“What’s going on here?”

“Nothing sir…”

 

I looked down at the little group of kids and then looked to Arushi who had tears streaming down her face. Kneeling down before her, I asked her what the matter was.

 

“They said… They were saying… I can’t do the presentation… Because I don’t have a papa…”

 

My heart broke for the little girl in front of me. Tears kept falling and she struggled to tell me what she wanted to say. Turning my attention back to the other children, I told them to say sorry and then told them to go and sit by the wall for the rest of their break time.
Once they all walked away, I turned my attention back to Arushi.

 

“Are you okay?”

 

She nodded her little head as she wiped her tears.

 

“Can I go inside please?”

 

I looked around and saw that a few of the other teachers were outside, meaning that they could watch the rest of the kids. I nodded and let Arushi go inside and went in with her.

As soon as she got back into our classroom, she went over to her cubby and pulled out her lunchbox. Coming back to her table, she set her lunchbox down and opened it.

Taking out a smaller box, I watched as she opened it and took out the contents from within.

 

“Jalebis?”

 

Nodding, she turned her attention back to the jalebi and ate it. I watched as she ate the first jalebi and then another.

She reminded me of Khushi. Whenever Khushi was upset, she’d make jalebis and then eat them. When Nimisha entered our lives, Khushi was almost always in the kitchen, making and eating jalebis. It got to the point where she had a plate of jalebis by our bed at all times.

Turning my attention back to Arushi, I watched as she tidy her things away, washed her hands and then came back to sit at her desk.

 

“Feeling better now?”

“Lots.”

“Eating jalebis helps?”

“Helps lots. Mama says that there is no sadness that jalebis can’t fix.”

“Your mama is right. Jalebis can fix everything.”

“Not everything…”

 

The slight light that had been in her eyes were gone again.

 

“Didn’t you tell me your mama makes the best jalebis? Surely if they’re the best then they can fix anything.”

“They can’t bring me my papa. The others are right, sir, I can’t do the Father’s Day event. I don’t even have a real dad.”

“Arushi…”

“I don’t want to do it.”

“But you were so excited.”

“I don’t want to do it any more sir.”

 

And with that she got to her feet and went back outside to spend the rest of her break time in the playground.

I should have gone back outside too, but I decided to stay inside, to just think about what had happened.

 

Arushi wanted her dad, but it seemed as though he wasn’t in the picture. Maybe her parents were divorced? Or maybe her father passed away? There was no way to tell and there was no way to ask her without upsetting her.

But more than that, what was troubling me was how much she reminded me of Khushi. The way she ate her jalebis, the way she spoke about them.

Was I going insane? Was I making links where there were no links? Was I imagining these resemblances? What was happening to me?

Whatever it was, it reiterated something I already knew. I was still madly in love with Khushi and I needed her back in my life. I was starting to see her in a child who probably had no connection to her whatsoever. I needed to find her. I needed to get her back. If I don’t, I think I really will go insane.

Jalebi ~ Part 24

Somehow the night had passed for Arnav. He spent most of the night consulting with his legal team and in between, called Khushi whenever he got a free moment.

For the first part of the night, Khushi’s phone just rang for a long time before going to voicemail. During the second part of the night, her phone just went straight to voicemail.

 

According to the legal team, he could sign her business back over to her, however, he had to pass his decision past Akash first and make sure he also signed the papers. This was a new clause that Akash must have added, because Arnav had never had to ask Akash to sign anything off before. And considering how Akash had been acting, there was no way he was about to sign the papers for Arnav to hand his business back over to her. He’d have to find a way to sort this without bringing Akash in between.

 

Getting out of bed, Arnav reached out for his phone and saw that there were no messages or calls from Khushi. He attempted to call her once more, but again, her phone went straight to voicemail. He left her another text, asking her to please call him and that he loved her.

He decided to call the house, maybe she’d answer that phone. After only two rings, the phone was answered.

 

“Hello? Khushi?”

“Arnav? It’s me, her papa.”

“Oh, namaste uncle. How are you? Is Khushi there? Can I speak to her please?”

“Arnav…”

“Uncle please, please ask her to speak to me once.”

“She isn’t here.”

“Uncle if she’s refusing to come to the phone, please tell her…”

“No Arnav. She’s not here. She got the last flight out to England last night.”

“What?!”

 

Arnav felt his head spin. Khushi had left? She’d gone back to England? Without even saying anything?

 

“She explained in a rush what happened between you two. I can’t exactly say I tried to stop her.”

“Uncle, I know what it seems like, but you have to believe me, I didn’t do it! I wouldn’t! Sir, I love your daughter more than I love anything else in this world.”

“I understand all this, but at the same time, this has happened. Khushi has worked for so long to get to where she was and now to lose it all…”

“I’ll sort it, I’ll have it all signed back to her.”

“I’m hoping I wasn’t completely wrong about you and that you will give her back what’s hers, but I don’t know if she’ll ever trust you again Arnav. I know my daughter, I think it will take a lot for her to accept you again and for you to get your relationship back on track.”

“Uncle, I love her truly and deeply. Even if it means waiting a lifetime for her, I am willing to do it.”

“I don’t know Arnav… I really don’t know what to say to you.”

“When is she coming back from England?”

“I don’t know. But me and her mother are flying out by the end of this week as well. Anyway, I have to go, take care of yourself son and try and get all this fixed.”

 

Saying goodbye, Arnav disconnected the call. Khushi had gone back to England? This complicated things. How was he going to try and sort things out with her if she was all the way on the other side of the world? And it didn’t help that she wasn’t taking his calls or replying to his messages. He could go after her, but then it would be harder to deal with the business side of things. But he needed to explain the truth to her.

Arnav came to the conclusion that he would let her be for a couple of days and then he would try and contact her again. This way she would have some time to cool down.

 

*****

 

At the breakfast table, everyone was sat around, waiting for the new bride to emerge with breakfast.

 

“Good morning bhai.”

 

Arnav completely disregarded Akash as he took his seat. This didn’t go unnoticed by the members of the Raizada family. They all looked to one another, confused as to what had transpired between the two brothers. Ever since they had been children, their morning would begin with a fist bump or a pat on the others back as they walked past. Today for the first time ever, Arnav didn’t respond to Akash.

Nani raised her eyebrow and looked to Anjali who just nodded, trying to signify that she would explain all later. Payal emerged from the kitchen with the help of Hari Prakash and placed all the food on the table.

 

“Payal, before you serve the food, could you sit down please. I want to talk to everyone about something.”

 

Arnav gestured Payal to sit down.

 

“Chote what’s the matter?”

“Nani I…”

 

Taking a deep breath, Arnav got to his feet.

 

“I’m in love with someone. And I want to marry her.”

 

Manorama dropped her spoon and gasped.

 

“Arnav bitwa? Shaadi? We aren’t even finished with one marriage yet and you already want us to start planning the next one.”

“Haan mamiji. Nani, I’m in love with Khushi and she loves me too and I want to marry her.”

 

The elders all told Arnav that they had no objections, that they were happy that Arnav found someone he wanted to marry.

Anjali sat and watched.

 

“Chote, this is all good and well, but…”

 

Arnav nodded and turned his attention back to Nani.

 

“Something happened yesterday, and I’m trying to get it resolved as soon as possible but Khushi’s left me…”

 

Now Devyani was confused.

 

“I don’t understand Chote.”

 

Arnav explained what had happened, the fact that he was now the sole owner of both the businesses. He explained that he didn’t know how it happened and that he was going to get it sorted as soon as possible.

 

“But she’s left, she’s gone back to London and she won’t answer me calls, I don’t know what to do now.”

 

At this point Payal, who had remained quiet throughout the whole ordeal looked up.

 

“Wait? She’s gone back to London? When did this happen?”

“She took the last flight out last night.”

 

Payal stood there stunned, completely unable to understand what was going on. When had all this happened and when had Khushi left? And why hadn’t she said anything before leaving?

 

“Look, I just wanted everyone to know what the deal was, but I also want to reassure that I am going to get this all sorted and I am going to get Khushi back even if it’s the last thing I do. I love her and she means the world to me. I’m not going to let all this come between us and ruin what we have. I won’t stand for it.”

 

He aimed all this at Akash, making him know that no matter what happened, he wasn’t going to let this slide, that he wasn’t just going to let him win like this.

If Akash wanted to play dirty, then he was going to fight back. And he was going to win.

 

*****

 

A few weeks had passed and there was still no word from Khushi. Every call that was made to her went unanswered and every text message was unread.

Arnav had been checking with Payal if she knew anything but she didn’t. Khushi’s parents had gone back to England now and so Arnav couldn’t even speak to them to see what they had to say.

In terms of the business, Arnav had been working his hardest to get things sorted, but without Akash authorising anything, Arnav couldn’t do anything himself. It was starting to stress him out, and he was starting to feel like he couldn’t handle it all any more.

Sat in his office, Arnav was reading through some files when Akash walked in.

 

“Bhai, you have a meeting with Singhania’s. Have you got the file that they asked for?”

 

Arnav looked down at his desk and located the file that he was looking for. Opening it up, he realised that he hadn’t read over it and made the changes that were necessary.

 

“I haven’t had the changes done. But come on.”

 

Getting to his feet, Arnav slipped his jacket back on. But Akash stood there, annoyed.

 

“You had one job bhai! Where is your mind these days? You’re not getting anything done at all. Come on you need to focus.”

“Don’t tell me how to run my own damn business Akash.”

“No, I need to tell you. If you carry on at this rate, were not going to have a business, forget two. You’re responsible for two very successful business and at the moment they’re both starting to suffer due to your incompetence.”

 

This angered Arnav. How dare Akash walk in and tell him he was incompetent.

 

“I wonder why I’m so incompetent? Maybe it’s because you ruined my relationship with my girlfriend and I’ve been trying to sort it.”

“A woman should never be more important than your business.”

“Well she is Akash! And you ruined that for me.”

“You need to forget about her and you need to get your shit together.”

 

Anger bubbled though Arnav’s body. How dare Akash speak to him like that after everything he’d put him through.

 

“You know what Akash. You do it. I’m done.”

 

Grabbing his suit jacket and his laptop bag, Arnav made his way over to his office door.

 

“What do you mean you’re done?”

“I mean I’m going to speak to my lawyers and I’m signing everything over to you. I’m done with all of this. If you think you can do better than go for it. I’m done.”

 

Arnav walked over to the door and walked out of the office. He was speaking the truth and he was being serious. He really was done. All this wealth, all this name and respect, it was all great but what did it matter if he didn’t have the woman he loved in his life? Well he was done. Akash could have it all. He didn’t want any of this.

Akash watched as Arnav descended the stairs and made his way out of the office building. Once he was actually gone, Akash looked around. This office… It was now his? He walked round to the chair that was his brothers and touched the top before pulling it out. Sitting down, Akash felt all his happiness erupt out of him. This was all his! He owned it all!

Like a child, Akash spun in Arnav’s large chair before putting his feet up on the desk. Finally. Things as they should be.

 

*****

 

Staring out at the night sky, looking up at the stars, Arnav recalled his passionate night with Khushi at the farmhouse. The night they’d made love under the stars, with the rain coming down around them.

 

“How could you just leave Khushi? After everything we went through to get together?”

 

But Arnav wasn’t determined to get her back. Their story wasn’t over yet.

 

Unwanted ~ Interlude II

Raj

 

Stood by my window, I looked out at the world. I don’t know how I was feeling, but I wasn’t feeling great. Reading the news that Arnav was in town shook me up a bit. I mean I know I shouldn’t feel like that. At the end of the day, Arnav was Khushi’s husband and Arushi’s father. No matter how much I wanted to forget the truth, it’s always there. If Khushi left me to go back to Arnav, I couldn’t stop her.

I remember when I first met Khushi, it was literally a matter of coming home one evening and finding her sat there with mom. It was quite late, so I remember getting into the house half asleep and being told that she was our new paying guest. I had been so busy back then, I barely had any time to sit down and talk to her. It wasn’t until about a month after she moved in that I properly spoke to her. The moment I actually spoke to Khushi, I liked her. She was kind, funny and she seemed to care for mom which was something I appreciated.

Once I actually started paying attention to the fact that she was here, I started realising more about her. Like I noticed how when she smiled, her smile never actually reached her eyes. Her bedroom was next to mine, so at night, I’d hear her crying.
It was about 2 months after she’d been with us when she finally stopped crying every night.

 

And then she found out she was pregnant.

 

When she found out she was pregnant, she spent the entire first week in her room, crying. And I understand why. Over time, mom had told me more and more about why she’d left Arnav. So I understood why it was so hard for her to find out that she was pregnant. But regardless, she pulled herself together and she got her head down. She worked hard to make sure that she always had enough money and she became family more than a paying guest.

Once our financial struggles ended, we told Khushi she didn’t need to pay any more, but she won’t hear of it. She said that unless we wanted her to move out, she would carry on paying her rent as she had done.

Time went on and Arushi was born. After Arushi came along, it was evident that Khushi was struggling. I think she found it hard, having a baby but not having her husband beside her.

Up to this point, a strong level of trust and understanding had formed between me and Khushi and Khushi and mom. However everything seemed to go backwards after Arushi was born. Khushi wouldn’t let her baby out of her site and she’d never leave her with us at all. Mom said we shouldn’t take it personally, that she’d get better, but up until then, we had to be patient with her. Mom was right, at first Khushi wouldn’t let us go anywhere near Arushi, but as some time went on, she got more comfortable with leaving her with us.

As Arushi got older, she and Khushi needed two rooms. When Khushi had started talking about moving out, me and mom wouldn’t hear of it. We still had a spare room in our house, so we told Khushi that Arushi could have that room but we refused to let Khushi pay for another room. After much reluctance, she finally agreed.

 

*****

 

Time went on and the four of us started to feel more and more like a family. Over the years, mom had suggested that I marry Khushi. Now I have to admit, I did like Khushi. I liked spending time with her and I felt happy with her. Maybe I was slightly in love with her. How could one not fall in love with her? She was strong, brave, sweet and crazy beautiful. But I knew I couldn’t marry her. Her heart belonged to Arnav. Every Karva Chauth, she kept a fast in his name, she still wore her mangalsoothra and she always had some sindoor on too. She was still Arnav’s wife and I knew it would be stupid to even ask for her hand.

Initially Arushi didn’t call me papa. She knew I wasn’t her dad. When she first started addressing us, I was mamaji and mom was Nani. When Arushi got a little bit older and realised that all kids around her had a dad except her, she asked Khushi about her father. The question threw Khushi and she struggled to answer. But mom told her that she did have a father, of course she did, but her dad lived very far away and he always had a lot of work so he couldn’t come. But Arushi was assured that her father loved her. Maybe it’s because I was around, Arushi never truly felt Arnav’s absence. Arushi was a sweet child, never caused any problems and like her mother, she too was immensely loving. It wasn’t hard to love Arushi.

But it was as she got older and she started going to school, the kids around her realised that she didn’t have a dad and that upset Arushi. It was then that I took it upon myself to deal with it. All it took was going to school with her one day and all the teasing stopped. But by then, Arushi’s morale had been lowered and she asked Khushi about her dad more and more.

 

*Flashback*

 

“Mama I want my papa!”

 

I watched on as Arushi stamped her little feet, tears rolling down her face.”

 

“Arushi! Stop! You know your papa lives far away.”

“But why can’t go to see him?”

“Because we can’t! He lives in Delhi, it’s too far.”

“I want to talk to him on the phone.”

 

Arushi continued to cry and from her voice, I could tell that Khushi too was on the verge of tears. It wasn’t my business but I couldn’t see either of them like this. I walked into Arushi’s bedroom and kneeled before her.

 

“What’s the matter princess?”

“I want my papa.”

“But beta, you know your papa is far away.”

“But I want my papa! Everyone has a papa, I want mine!”

 

I saw Khushi take a step forward, but I stopped her.

 

“Why do you want your papa? You have your mama, you have me and you have your Nani. We all love you.”

“But I want…”

“Okay, how about this. How about I be your papa?”

 

She stopped crying and looked at me, confusion on her little face.

 

“You can be my papa?”

“If you want to call me papa, I will be your papa.”

“But I have a papa.”

“You can have 2. One who is far away and one who is with you all the time. There’s nothing wrong with having two papa’s. Double the love for you.”

 

I watched as she played with the idea. She looked confused, but her little face lit up and she nodded frantically before hugging me.

 

“Can I call you papa and take you to the Father’s Day event?”

“Of course.”

“Yayyyy!”

 

Jumping up, she gave me a big hug before running out of the room. I turned to Khushi who looked completely exhausted.

 

“I’m sorry, I should have checked with you…”

“Thank you. You saved me today Raj. I didn’t know what to do…”

“Khushi, I know you hate speaking about this but maybe you should let her meet him just once.”

“Raj you know why I can’t do that. How can I introduce her to her father when her father doesn’t even know she exists?”

“Maybe it’s time he did know Khushi.”

 

She turned away from me and I knew that this meant that this conversation was over once more. Honestly, I didn’t want Khushi to reach out to Arnav, but I wanted her and Arushi to be happy always. No matter how happy Khushi acted, it was obvious that she wanted to be with her husband. And after all, why wouldn’t she want that? Nothing had gone wrong between them, they hadn’t had a break up. Yes, he had a child with someone else, but he was with that person before Khushi entered his life so she couldn’t even be angry about that. There was nothing that made her bitter towards Arnav and so it made sense why she still wanted to be with him.

 

*Flashback end*

 

From that day onwards, I have been Arushi’s papa. But despite having me and calling me papa, she still wanted to meet her real father. She didn’t ask about his often, but she did every now and again and those days were still hard for Khushi. I wished Arushi would accept me as her father and completely forget that she actually has another mans blood running through her, but it seemed that wasn’t going to happen.

No matter how much love I have forher, she would always be Arushi Singh Raizada, daughter of Arnav Singh Raizada. And no matter how much I loved Khushi, she would forever be the wife of Arnav Singh Raizada. The lucky dog. He was blessed with the two people I wanted more than anything, yet he wasn’t fortunate enough to have them.

I guess I should really feel sorry for him, but at the end of the day I envy him. Because in my heart I know, one day, Khushi and Arushi will go back to him. I don’t know when and how, but I know, I can feel it in my body. They will return to him…

Jalebi ~ Part 23

 

Rushing out of the wedding venue, Khushi avoided bumping into anyone. She couldn’t face anyone now, she couldn’t explain what had happened.

Arnav rushed after Khushi but someone caught hold of his sleeve and pulled him back.
Turning, he saw that the person holding him was his Di.

 

“Di let me go, I really need to go to Khushi.”

“Chote, what the hell is going on? I heard the back end of your argument with Khushi and it sounded… Chote what the hell have you done?”

“I swear Di, I haven’t done anything, something has gone seriously wrong and if I don’t sort it, I could lose her.”

“Look, I understand, but I can’t have you leave now. It’s our brother’s wedding.”

 

Dragging Arnav back, he protested, tried to explain to Anjali that he needed to leave. When he realised that his protests were going completely unnoticed, he watched as Payal and Akash prepared to start doing the holy rounds. He looked at Akash who looked so happy. So content with life. How could he be so calm when Arnav’s life was being flipped over completely?

Akash looked down from the mandap and he watched as Di brought Arnav back into the main hall. As he saw Arnav’s face, he smirked. The deed had been done, the arrow had hit the target. He had planned his move carefully. He had gotten both Arnav and Khushi to sign the papers ages back, but hadn’t filed them. He knew that if he had filed them earlier, it may have caused issues with his wedding. So he waited. And he only had the papers filed this morning. This way, the proceedings would happen during the day, and by the time it came to Arnav and Khushi’s knowledge, it would be time for his wedding. He knew that Arnav wouldn’t cause a scene and confront him while he was getting married.

Mentally Akash pat himself on the back. Stage one was complete, now for stage two…

 

*****

 

“Mohit I need to see those papers.”

 

Handing over the papers, Khushi sat down at his desk and went through them.
These papers were detailed, they covered everything. But the main point was that she had given up all her rights to her business to Arnav.

Tears streaming down her face, Khushi shut the file and threw it at the wall.

 

“I don’t understand Mohit! I’m always so careful about what I’m signing! How did this happen?”

 

Taking a seat opposite Khushi, he placed his hand over hers.

 

“Khushi, I know this is hard. As your friend, not as your lawyer, I would recommend you go back to England for a while. I know all you want to do is get this sorted, but right now I don’t see what we can do. You go to London, take some time out and I’ll stay and see what I can do. I’ll try and get to the bottom of everything.”

“I can go to London but I won’t get any peace.”

“I know, but at least you won’t have to face Arnav all the time.”

“I don’t understand Mohit, I really don’t…”

 

Covering her face with her hands, Khushi let herself cry. How could this happen, why was this happening. She had loved Arnav with all  her heart. How could he possibly have done this?

 

 

*****

 

It was much later and the wedding was done. Payal had been welcomed into the home as the Raizada bride and the little post wedding games had been played. Di had taken Payal up to Akash’s bedroom, and Arnav used this opportunity to pull Akash away and speak to him.

 

“Bhai, what’s up? I don’t really have time to discuss anything now, need to get upstairs and get busy, if you know what I mean.”

“I think you’ve already been busy.”

“No I haven’t. That’s only you.”

 

Laughing at the suggestive joke that he just made, Akash attempted to side step Arnav and leave. But Arnav wasn’t having it today. Placing his hand on Akash’s shoulder, he pulled him back.

 

“What the hell are you playing at Akash.”

“I don’t know what you mean?”

“Don’t act dumb. Akash, how the hell am I sole owner of AR Designs and Khushiyan?”

“What? You are? I didn’t know that!”

“Don’t lie Akash! No one else knew the plan other than you. Why the hell did you do it?”

 

Dropping the pretence, Arnav watched as Akash’s expression changed from his easy going one to a much more sinister one.

 

“Okay, fine, yes I went through with the plan. I made both you and Khushi sign those papers. It’s thanks to me you own 2 successful businesses.”

“But you knew I didn’t want this!”

“You didn’t want it, but you needed it and you knew that! AR may still be floating, but we both know that without the backing of Khushiyan, AR is going to sink completely.”

“We had the backing of Khushiyan!”

“But it’s not the same when it’s owned by someone else! We needed 100% power to make sure that everything went the way we wanted it to.”

“You’re crazy! The whole point of the partnership was so that we would be able to make things better for AR. We knew we had Khushiyan’s backing.”

“Why are you reacting so badly bhai? You own two businesses now!”

“I may have gained a business, but I’ve lost the most important person in my life.”

“There was nothing special about Khushi any way, you’ll get over her.”

“I love her Akash! I was going to marry her! She means more to me than these businesses do!”

“You may love her that much, but she obviously doesn’t feel the same. If she did, she wouldn’t have cared about the business.”

“You don’t get it Akash! She thinks I cheated her!”

 

Beginning to get impatient, Akash looked at his watch before turning back to Arnav.

 

“Look, it’s my wedding night, my wife is waiting for me. We’ll talk about this tomorrow.”

“How are you going to be able to look Payal in the eye and get close to her when you know you’re the reason her sisters heart is broken right now.”

“We’ll deal with that when she finds out.”

 

With that, Akash turned away. Arnav felt anger coursing through his body. This wasn’t meant to happen, this couldn’t be happening!

He walked into his room, picked up a vase and threw it against the floor, making it shatter into a million pieces.

 

“AGH!”

“Chote?”

 

Turning around, Arnav realised Di was stood at the entrance of his door, her eyes wide. Walking into the room, Anjali observed the broken case, but stepped around it and placed her hands on her brothers shoulders.

 

“Chote what’s the matter? What’s going on? What I saw between you and Khushi and now… All this anger? I haven’t seen you like this in such a long time, what happened?”

“Di…”

 

Finally the anger subsided and Arnav felt like crap. His heart hurt, his head hurt… Tears rolled down his face as he hugged his sister.

 

“Chote…”

“Everything is ruined Di.”

 

Anjali hugged her brother. She hadn’t seen him this upset in a long, long time. Breaking the hug, she led Arnav to the recliner and sat him down, before sitting down beside him. Laying down in her lap, he wrapped his arms around her and cried. Anjali stroked his hair, he hadn’t cried to her in this manner since they had been children.

She let him cry, let him get it all out of his system. When Arnav finally calmed down, he sat up.

 

“She ended it.”

“What? But why Chote?”

 

Arnav explained about the business, about how he was now the only owner of both business. He skipped the part about it all being down to Akash.

 

“I don’t understand how this just happened though.”

 

He realised he couldn’t hide the truth, and also realised he didn’t really care about trying to protect Akash. He ruined his life, made Khushi walk away from him, while he was still living happily. He couldn’t defend him.

Arnav explained everything, from the beginning. He explained the original plan, about Akash’s insistence, about the fact that he thought that Akash would back off now that Arnav and Khushi were serious about each other.

 

“I can’t believe Akash would do that! Chote, I know he’s our brother, but I’m sure there’s more to the story. Otherwise I don’t see why he’d go through with it, especially when he knew there was no need. It’s almost as though he did it to make a mess between you and Khushi. I don’t know Chote, you need to find out what Akash’s game plan is.”

“I really can’t deal with him now Di. I need to focus on Khushi, I can’t lose her Di! But she’s not been picking up my calls or responding to my messages. She hasn’t even opened my WhatsApp messages. Di, it can’t be over between us. I love her.”

“She’s angry, and she’s confused. Give her some time, she’ll come round.”

“I’ll sign her business back over to her, I’ll even give her half of mine on top of all of hers, anything. I just need her to give me a chance.”

“She will, don’t worry. You both love each other. She won’t let this end.”

 

Getting off the recliner, Arnav opened his wardrobe and took a little box out before coming back to Di.

 

“I brought this the other day, I was going to talk to Nani while Akash and Payal went back to Payal’s maternal home tomorrow. And then after that, within the next few days I was going to propose to Khushi.”

 

Anjali took the box from Arnav and opened it up. She gasped at the ring inside.

It was in the shape of a flower, a large diamond in the middle with lots and lots of little diamonds around it.

 

“Chote this is beautiful!”

“I wanted it to be something different, something extra special, like she is… But now…”

 

Tears gathered in his eyes once more. Anjali wiped them away with her hand and she shook her head.

 

“Give her some time. In the meantime you need to get this sorted, you need to fix this stuff with the businesses. I’ve seen the way you look at each other, she loves you as much as you do her. She won’t just end things with you like this.”

“Her business is her life. She’s worked so, so hard to get it to where it is…”

“And we will give back what’s her. Don’t worry Chote, we will fix this!”

 

Hugging his sister once again, Arnav prayed that Di was right and that they would be able to sort this out. If they can’t… He didn’t want to think what would happen if he couldn’t get her back.

 

*****

 

The clock struck 2am and Akash was stood by his window, looking out at the moonless sky. He turned around, looked at the sleeping, naked Payal in the bed and turned away again. How had his life come to this, how had he settled for his second choice?

Akash had been in love with Khushi for as long as he could remember. Back in high school, before he began dating Payal, his heart was set on trying to win Khushi over. When everyone else saw her as Jalebi, he saw her as Khushi. She was smart, talented, and beneath all the nerd, he could see a beauty. Maybe his friends had realised his attraction towards her, maybe that’s why they dared him to ask her out…

 

*Flashback*

 

“Go on Akash, we dare you! Go and ask Jalebi out on a date! She’ll never say no to you.”

 

Laughing, Akash fixed his collar and marched over to her. They were right, she’d never say no to him.

He looked at Khushi who was sat at a table, busy working away.

 

“Hi.”

 

Looking up, Khushi smiled and regarded him before she went back to her work.
Taking a seat at her table, Akash waited for her to notice him again. She didn’t.

 

“Ahem.”

 

Looking up once again, Khushi shut her book.

 

“Can I help you?”

“I was wondering if you’d like to go out on a date with me?”

 

Looking taken aback, Khushi tried to make sense of what Akash was saying to her.

 

“Are you asking me on a date?”

“Yes. So will you?”

“Look Akash, I’m flattered but… No. I’m sorry.”

 

Gathering her books up, Khushi got to her feet and then left. Akash watched as she walked away, not being able to comprehend what just happened. She rejected him? She rejected him! Everyone wanted to go out on a date with her and here she was, rejecting him! How dare she?

He watched her walk away, she didn’t even look back at him.

It was then he decided that he had to have her. He needed to find a way to catch her attention and make her realise that she wanted him. Akash’s eyes feel on a table of girls and he saw the girl he was looking for, Payal Gupta. Khushi’s cousin.
Smiling, Akash decided on what he was going to do…

 

*Flashback end*

Slamming his fist against the wall, Akash cursed himself. How had trying to make Khushi jealous end up with him marrying Payal? He should’ve realised that it wasn’t going to make a difference to her, that she didn’t want him. But he had hoped, somewhere along the line she would have realised that she had feelings for him too, but she didn’t.

This plan, to take her business, that was his punishment for her rejecting him all those years back. He couldn’t let that go. And now thinking about it all, he realised she deserved this. She deserved to have everything taken from her. She had rejected him, yet she ended up sleeping with his brother. His no good, good for nothing brother. What did Arnav have that he didn’t? Why was she willing to jump into Arnav’s bed but not his?

Thinking about it, he guessed Arnav deserved this too. He deserved to have Khushi hate him and think the worst of him. Arnav always had everything handed to him on a plate. He never had to work for anything, he always got what he wanted. Well not any more. He lost Khushi and that was good enough for Akash. If he couldn’t have Khushi, then Arnav couldn’t have her either.